Mental Illness & Support: Tips From a Local Psychiatrist

When a friend or family member is suffering from a mental health condition, a local psychiatrist can be a huge help. However, support from loved ones can be just as crucial. As an adult psychiatrist who treats a variety of mental illnesses, I find that taking the following steps can be instrumental in making symptoms more manageable, as well as encouraging people to engage more fully in effective treatment options​​

Educate Yourself

Whether your loved one is dealing with a major depressive disorder, bipolar disorder, anxiety or another mental health condition, education can be a great first step to take. I encourage you to read reputable sources to help you understand the symptoms, treatment options and common challenges associated with a specific condition.
For example, as a bipolar disorder psychiatrist, I find it can be helpful for loved ones to recognize early signs of mania or depression, as this can help you more quickly encourage treatment and help you better understand the mood changes common to those with this disorder. Additionally, it can be smart to research tips and strategies to help your loved one through difficult times. ​

It’s important to remember that sometimes the most powerful tool we have is our ability to simply listen without judgment or commentary. It can be helpful for people with a mental illness to simply have an outlet for their feelings. A listening ear and a hug can help make a loved one feel heard and less alone.

Often, it’s not wise to offer advice or quick fixes, particularly if you’ve never dealt with the specific condition. It’s also not helpful to tell someone to “worry less,” or “think positively,” or “focus on their blessings.”

While a positive attitude and gratitude are certainly good to have and can be beneficial, a person with a mental health disorder has a real illness and needs more substantial help than empty platitudes. Just as a positive attitude won’t cure cancer or diabetes, it won’t cure a mental health issue either. Again, it can be helpful, but it won’t cure the problem.
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Here's another example: as an eating disorder psychiatrist, I often find that friends and loved ones will say things like, “just eat a little more,” or perhaps shame them by sharing the dangers of eating disorders. It’s best to focus on providing support and not on criticism or minimizing a person’s struggles.

Use Supportive Language

Again, empty platitudes and criticisms are not helpful and tend to oversimplify your loved one’s struggles. Instead, it’s best to focus on how you can provide support. If you see someone struggling with any type of mental illness, from a substance use disorder to treatment resistant depression to PTSD or something else, here are a few phrases that might facilitate a beneficial conversation.

• “I’ve noticed you are struggling, and I am concerned about you.”
  
• “I’m here to listen if you want to talk about it.”
  
• “Would you like me to help you find a local psychiatrist or therapist?”
  
• “You don’t have to go through this alone. I care and want to support you.”

These are just a few ways to show concern without showing judgment. In many cases, a person might not be ready to seek help or may feel shame about seeking help. As a concerned loved one, you can assure them that seeking help for a mental illness is the same as seeking help for any type of illness and even offer to go with them for their first appointment or sit with them as they call a therapist or psychiatrist.

Provide Tangible Help

Often, helping with daily tasks can be a huge help to someone struggling. For instance, offer to provide childcare so that your loved one can attend therapy sessions, meet with a doctor, or attend a support group.
Offering to help with tasks such as laundry, cleaning, running errands or providing meals can be a huge help. If your loved one is reluctant to accept help, you can simply phrase it casually.

Perhaps you are running errands and simply ask if you can grab them a few things while you are out. You could even say you miss hanging out and offer to stop by with a movie and dinner, and then ask if you could help with a little cleaning or laundry while you are there. Just phrase it gently, “I know it can be tough to handle these tasks when you aren’t feeling well, and I would love to help out and to just spend some time with you.”

Another option would be to pick up your friend and take them for a drive or go for a walk. Getting outside in the sunshine and enjoying some light exercise can be very beneficial for all of us. Multiple studies show that sunlight can boost serotonin as well as our Vitamin D levels, both of which can help lessen symptoms of depression and reduce stress. It might not serve as a long-term cure, but often a lift in mood can lead someone to seek help and feel a bit more hopeful in general.
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In some cases, it can be ok to just head over and help or just head over, make a cup of tea, and sit quietly with someone or offer to go on a walk. However, keep in mind that this can sometimes feel very overwhelming. Use your best judgment, but also respect your loved one’s boundaries. 

Be Patient

As a psychiatrist for depression, anxiety, and many other mental illnesses, I know that it can be frustrating sometimes to provide support. Keep in mind that recovery and management of a mental illness does take time. There’s no one-size-fits-all treatment, and it can take weeks or months to see improvement.  
It can be difficult to be patient, but I recommend trying not to show frustration when the progress feels slow or your loved one is struggling. If you are frustrated, it can be wise to seek out the services of a therapist to provide you with a safe space to release your emotions and also have a support system, which leads me to the next point.

Don’t Neglect Your Needs & Get Support

Supporting a person with any mental or physical illness can be difficult and draining, so don’t forget to engage in wellness activities that support your needs. Whether you opt for meditation, talking with a therapist, or perhaps heading outside for a hike, your mental wellness is crucial.
Caregiver burnout is very common, and it’s hard to take care of others if your mental wellness is not in good shape. It also can help to join a support group, either in-person or virtual. Not only can this provide some much-needed support, but you likely will gain some tips and strategies to help you navigate complicated situations.

Recognize Emergencies

While not everyone with a mental illness considers suicide, it’s important to be aware of the signs. If your loved one expresses suicidal thoughts or shows signs of self-harm or an emotional crisis, seek immediate help. This might mean taking them to a medical facility or even calling 911. Some signs of suicidal ideation include:
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• Talking About Death/Suicide: A person might state that they wish to die or commit suicide, and this should always be taken seriously
• Expressing Hopelessness: A person might say, “everyone would be better off without me,” or “there’s just no point to life,” etc.)
• Withdrawal & Isolation: If you notice them pulling away from friends, family and social activities, including closing social media accounts, this could be a sign.  Changes in hygiene and diet, as well as sleeping too much or too little, also can be signs of a mental health crisis.
• Researching & Seeking Means: If you notice a person researching suicide methods or perhaps stockpiling medications, this is a serious sign. Additionally, they may also begin giving away possessions.
• Extreme Mood Changes: While you might notice signs of depression, it’s also important to be aware that a sudden lift in mood after a long period of depression can indicate that the person has made the decision to commit suicide and feels some relief from this decision.
• Risky Behaviors: This can be caused by a manic episode, and it can also be a sign that a person has no concern anymore for their own safety. Either way, these are signs that your loved one needs immediate help. 

What To Do When A Crisis Occurs

• Ask Questions: When you notice severe symptoms, it’s perfectly fine to ask them, calmly, if they are thinking of hurting themselves. In many cases, a person is actually relieved to be able to discuss it.
• Remove Immediate Dangers: Ensure that they do not have access to weapons, medications or other dangers.
• Encourage Professional Help: The national Suicide & Crisis Lifeline number is 988, and there are trained professionals available 24/7 to provide support for your loved one. You also can contact their psychiatrist or therapist for support.

Helping a loved one as they navigate mental illness is never easy, but following these tips can make the path to recovery smoother, both for your loved one and you. If you need the services of a local psychiatrist, I work as a psychiatrist in Thousand Oaks and as a psychiatrist in Westlake Village, serving patients in all nearby areas.
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As a local psychiatrist, I can help provide a comprehensive diagnosis and treatment plan that can allow your loved one to enjoy a healthier, happier life. I treat most mental health issues, and work as a psychiatrist for anxiety, depression, PTSD, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, ADHD, and more. I also work as an addiction psychiatrist and specialize in the complexities associated with co-occurring disorders.